January 17, 2013

Stop. No wait. Stop. I need you to relax. Just settle down. Be cool. Beeee cool. I'm not dead. I didn't move to a non-wifi connected location. I'm not protesting the internet. I've just been...busy. At least I was busy for awhile. And then I became not busy but updating the ol' blog was not on my list of things to do. Truth be told I wasn't in a great head space and blogging would feel forced. Or super depressing. And I don't want that. I feel things, but I like to feel them on the inside...of my house...in my room...alone. Because as soon as put my sadness out into the world of more than just my Mom and close amigos, people get annoying with it. And then I get more annoyed that I'm annoyed at people trying to be nice and comfort and help. I know so many of them are just doing it out of the goodness of their hearts and they just want to see me happy. But mostly, I'd just like to be left alone. Ya know? Sadness is temporary. Slumps happen. But it's harder to get up and get going and get over it when people treat you like a sick puppy. I'm not a sick puppy. I'm a healthy girl who happens to cry a little more often than usual.

Now. Alllllll that being said, I've moved past it all. Or at least, I'm currently moving. But it's almost in the rear view, so the dwelling is over. Because you all know what constantly dwelling does: Makes an ass out of you and me. What? No? That's not it? Fine. It makes me and ass for still dwelling and you an ass for correcting me DURING THIS TIME OF PAIN AND HEARTACHE.

Alrightalrightalright. I get it. The wound is still a bit tender. But it's not gushing blood anymore. Huh. While I believe that metaphor works, it turned real gross. All I picture now is so much blood. And that's all you see now too.

My brother is here in town visiting. I'm guessing if you're reading this because it was linked on my Facebook, you probably know that. Cause I've been tagging and updating his visit almost constantly. I can't help it. I just love that kid so much. And we're doing so many fun things. And also, I think he's super cool, and I think a lot of his friends are super cool. So I secretly want them to see all the posts and be like "Aww man! Look at all the fun stuff he's doing with his sister! She's awesome! I wish she were my sister!" You may think it's silly, but our relationship will forever be: Him=the popular jock and Me=the theatre nerd trying to make the popular jock laugh at her jokes. Thankfully, as we get older, the paths mesh a little more. He likes to see comedy shows and watch performances and I get, and even enjoy, sports.

So I think the important thing we've learned today is that even though life may give you oranges, make apple juice. Excuse me? WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT CORRECTING ME RIGHT NOW?