In an effort to be more healthy (to be healthier?) I gave up french fries and pizza for February. Actually, it hasn't been as hard as I thought it would be. Granted, February is the shortest month and I'm not quite done yet, but I'm going strong. Before you mark me down as your health inspiration, however, be certain I have filled my plate with plenty of unhealthy choices. Cheetos are a real favorite, or Jalapeño chips, really, any kind of chips. Also, frozen Mexican food. I love Mexican food in any form, but box it up, throw it in the freezer and require me to microwave it to eat it and I am a sucker for it. I literally have a box of taquitos in my freezer right now that I am working so hard to resist. It's my own fault for mentioning them. And for buying them. But they were such a good deal at Aldi. Along with the $4.99 jumbo wine bottle. I feel bad for any of you who don't know about Aldi. But just believe there is a grocery store where over half of the items are under $2. I did not expect to go on this long about Aldi. But when you love something, you love something.
Let the record show that I also bought veggies and hummus and yogurt and other healthy choices at my Aldi visit. Okay. I said I'm making an effort towards health. But I'm not going to cold turkey all the tasty food treats that exist. I already gave up pizza for the month. And I live in Chicago. Did you hear me? I gave up pizza and I LIVE IN CHICAGO. Actually, I probably shouldn't say that so loud, I might get kicked out of the city. People get real angry about their foods here.
Sometimes food is hard though, you guys. At the risk of sounding like a depressed "Food has destroyed my life" girl, I won't go on and on. But it is a thing that exists. I think that because I don't show a lot of my emotions on the outside, the way I best confront them is by way of a fork full of pasta into my mouth. Emotional eating is real. And anyone who says different has not ugly cried watching The Last Song and ended up with no food for a week, wondering where all these 7/11 receipts came from. Emotional eating is the only reason ice cream exists. Ben and Jerry clearly have no idea how to work through their feelings. If you tell me that you do not feel a sense of joy and/or peace and/or comfort when you put that Cookies n' Cream into your mouth and you feel how cool it is, but how it immediately melts and then you feel the Oreo and there's that tiny crunch that's almost too cold for your teeth but you take another bite anyway, if you do not feel that, then you are a robot and I am nervous about you reading my blog because that means you are intelligent and the human race is doomed.
This is, of course, where I tell you that the food doesn't actually comfort you, the same way alcohol and drugs don't solve your problems. When you wake up the next day and find your glasses at the bottom of an empty Cool Ranch Doritos bag next to your bed, you do not feel better about yourself. You feel like a fool so you take a picture of it, post it on Instagram and wait for people to laugh at your pain. (THIS REALLY HAPPENED IN MY LIFE.) Now is where I tell you that you can find happiness and endorphins other ways. Like exercise or new hobbies or volunteering. But it's okay for us to be real with each other. We've been friends for awhile now. It's okay to admit that you would rather spend 45 minutes on GrubHub than 45 minutes running. I get it. I get it and I like running. Yesssss I feel better after a run. But can't we just do both?!
Thus the compromise I'm making. I ate 6 of those taquitos last night. And they are not at all good for you, nor do they make your tummy feel all that great. But, my compromise was then spending 80 minutes working them off at the gym. You heard me. 80 minutes. I think this might be what they call "having my cake and eating it too" or "let them eat cake" or "who ate all my cake?!" It's one of those, I'm sure of it.
Did we learn a lesson here today? I'm not sure, that's up to you. Did we learn that 75% of Erin's internal struggle is food related? Yes. Yes we did. 20% is how to be the funniest in the room and the remaining 5% is how not to act awkward in front of boys. They're all very directly related. Because if I fail at the funny or the boys, my desire for a hamburger goes off the charts. And since I find I'm generally successfully funny, my food related wants must come from the boy thing. But we can't touch on that in this post. I'll ruin my cred as "Not the girliest girl in the room" if I talk about emotional eating AND boy trouble in the same post. Eek. Might as well just talk about my period while I'm at it.
Gross. That's gross. I need to balance this out.
How 'bout them Bulls tonight, right? Really took Charlotte down. And the Blackhawks? What a game!
There, now I feel better. It's 12:30am. Why aren't you all in bed?
No comments:
Post a Comment